My dog vs. Your kid....I win

You're probably thinking to yourself, what the hell is wrong with her? Her dog is better than my kid puhleeze...Well, yes there is something wrong with me, (one day I'll figure out what that is). But, i am here to tell you just why my dog is better than your kid.
1. No college tuition to save for
2. I save tons of money at Christmas and birthdays
3. They have no problem eating the same thing every day
4. they are never not happy to see me.
5. They will never develop and eating disorder, drug habit or become an alcoholic
6. If I need money, I can make videos of them, post them to you-tube and no one will say I am exploiting them
7. Save money on back to school clothes
8. I don't have to worry about their self-esteem
9. Being Irish, I'm used to children disappointing their parents and now I dont' have to worry

AND

10. If my dog goes missing, the neighbors will come help me look and put up flyers around the neighborhood. If your child goes missing, the police come and question you and you end up on a "Very Special Episode" of 20/20.

That's what I learned today.