The Husband discount

I love my husband. I also love to shop for lots of things. It used to be shoes, I had about 75 at the height of my madness but I've managed to stop buying shoes for the time being anyway. Which brings me to my point, you can love lots of things, but loving them at the same time.? Eh, not so much. Which brings me to the point of the "Husband discount".

When my husband and I first moved in together 10 years ago, there wasn't much to my closet. Shoes were not a consideration, I bought them at pay-less and used them until they fell apart. Till one day, I discovered the delight of coach shoes. I felt I had found my soul mate when I saw these shoes. They were pretty, fit me and did I mention they were pretty?

Now, the problem became in trying to get them past my husband. You should know that my husband owns three pairs of footwear. Notice I didn't say shoes, footwear. Which means he owns two pairs of sneakers and one pair of shoes. Trying to explain to a man like this why someone, namely me, needs purple shoes with flowers on them was next to impossible. So, I had to get a little creative.

The first thing I did was to tell him that a friend of mine let me borrow or gave them to me. This worked for a while until said friend (we're no longer friends now) came over and remarked to my husband, "why does she spend so much money on such ugly shoes?" My ex-friend being a fan of sensible 2 1/2 inch pumps and white reeboks. Yes, I probably should have told her what I was doing, but I thought she followed the girl code. You know "Never make comments about what someone is spending in the presence of husband." That code.

Since no one else I knew had my fashion sense or large feet, I knew I had to come up with a new plan. That's when I decided on the "husband discount".

The "husband discount" works like this. Say, you decided to buy those cute shoes and bring them home. If you have to tell your husband you bought them you figure out how much the price of the shoes were and when he asks you take anywhere from 10-90 percent off the price. He thinks you're being thrifty, you have nice shoes and everyone's happy.

For example, I once paid 340 dollars for a pair of boots. When my husband asked me how much they cost I immediately went into "husband discount" mode and told him they were 80 dollars. An 80% discount. He was still stunned that anyone would pay that much for a pair of boots so I knew that next time I'll have to raise the discount.

I know that there are some of you out there who say that you shouldn't keep secrets from your spouse and some of you whose husbands help you choose your shoes. To you, I say, hat's off and stop judging the rest of us. Sometimes a girl needs her secrets.